I've Been Through My Sketchy Phases

I have a roommate who just admitted to me the other day that she is bulimic.  She said that she feels like it is the one area of her life over which she can exert control.  I think this is just sad and crazy.  This girl works out hardcore every single day.  She is a vegetarian and eats really healthily.  She's skinny as a stick, and yet she struggles with an eating disorder.  I don't get it.  I've been through my sketchy phases where I've had an extremely poor self-image and I get obsessed with losing weight and looking beautiful.  But that's just it - they were phases, not a lifestyle.  She's taken something and turned it into a lifestyle.  And what's more, she's trying to justify it by claiming it is the only way she can be in control of some part of her life.

You know what I think?  I think she needs counselling and help.  Yes, it's important to feel like you are in charge of your life, but it is more important to treat your body with respect.  It is a gift from our Father in Heaven; it is our temple, it is not a vessel to desecrate.  And eating disorders are harming the beautiful miracle of a human body.  She is probably stuck in her mindset, which will take work to get out of.  Isn't this just so sad?  And also, being in control of your life...well, I feel like yes, we are in control to a degree, but ultimately, God is guiding us along, providing us with the necessary experiences, obstacles, and blessings that we need.  So are we ever truly in charge?

I don't have the answers on what to say or how to handle this gracefully.  Don't I wish I did?  Anyways, since I have promised to be truthful, here is the real scoop straight from my brain:

When she admitted to being bulimic, it made me more frustrated with her than I already am.  She's pretty and has the body that every girl dreams of.  She's stylish and smart.  But maybe not so smart...  I was already frustrated with her because she and my sister are all buddy-buddy and leave me out of things.  When my sister moved in with me, I thought it would be the epic era of the sisters, reunited.  It's turned into my sister and roommate having an epic era.  I feel like she's taken my sister (and friend) from me.  And in case you didn't know, I've endured a lot of discontinuations of friendships.  In other words, I have no friends right now whom I can truly confide in.  I thought my sister could become my confidante.  But no.

I need to stop being so selfish and just let it all go.  People all have their own struggles and trials and are just trying to make it through this life the best they can.  My roommate is included in that.  I attended a special fireside at which Elder David A. Bednar answered questions that we, as young single adults, had.  It was great.  What I got, generally, from his counsel and advice was to turn out - stop being so concerned with myself and focusing in on ME.  The Savior always turned out and helped others constantly.  He was entirely selfless.  I want to be like him, therefore, I need to act like him.  So instead of thinking about how upset I am, and how lonely I am, and how ugly I am, and how stressed I am, or WHATEVER, I need to start thinking about others and what I can do to help them.  So roommate, you will get no chastisement from me, only listening ears and sincere attempts at kindness.  You lucky dog.


This post's title came from this song:
Crazy Beautiful Life by Ke$ha