Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered

It's official.  I am the worst friend and lover in the whole world!  Remember my friend who loves me but who I don't love back because I thought I might love his best friend (which I actually don't love his best friend either)?  Yes, well I am leading on the first friend SO BADLY.  I love spending time with him and I love the validation that I get from his paying attention to me.  I love talking with him.  But lately, it has become very serious between us - as in we are basically dating.  Seeing each other EVERY SINGLE DAY.  It's also highly flirtatious.  I had thought I had my mind made up that I wasn't going to date him.  I wasn't going to hang out with him past 10:30 at night or hang out with him alone...and I threw all that out the window and let this little relationship develop and find that I am, as the song says, "bewitched, bothered, and bewildered."  I sometimes think I like him...but I'm bothered because I know that I didn't and that I was certain he was not what or who I needed in my life.  I'm bewildered because I'm experiencing all of these emotions that are typical of a relationship, but I'm certain that I don't want to truly have a relationship with him and so I'm feeling things that really should be attributed to another!  Bah!  This probably isn't making ANY sense at all!  I am a little bit of a wreck.

Let's talk about something else.  Something fun or whatever.  :)  Haha.  But who am I kidding?  Because really, this is the only thing on my mind - it is literally plaguing my mind.



This post's title came from this song:
Bewitched as sung by Ella Fitzgerald