Oh Carole King! How well you know my sentiments!
So I spent what felt like an eternity pining after The Extrovert and then he rejected me and shoved me in the friend zone. And while at least I know now that he will never want me, I am still sore over that fact.
I was watching a movie the other night, "Boys and Girls," you know, the one with the dreamy Freddie Prinze Jr.? Yeah... He was actually the only reason I invested my time into it. Haha. But there was a line in there that hit home so hard, I have to blog about it now.
When The Extrovert first came home and we had our little "reunion" or whatever you want to call it, I was ecstatic. It was a perfect night to me - the friendship was still there. We could talk freely about whatever. We were joking and laughing so much. And the spark of chemistry was very much alive and well. I loved the whole thing...and even though we got a little carried away in our passion, I still loved it all. But he obviously felt very differently about it. And the line I am obsessing over is: "Nothing will ever hurt me as much as your reaction to that same experience." I loved it. He hated it and wanted to put as much distance as possible between us. And now he's far away. On a different page, a different story entirely. And although I tell myself I'm fine and I'm doing really well without him (which is actually usually pretty true these days), it still hurts that he had such a negative reaction to something that I found so beautiful and wonderful.
I often wish it wasn't ruined and that we could still be in one another's lives, still be in love, and still want each other. But I guess the logical part of me knows that what happened between us is what was supposed to have happened. And I need to learn to be okay with that.
This post's title came from this song:
So Far Away by Carole King
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